STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
we're so committed to being not committed
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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