I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
