Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
