Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
