forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Randomize
