i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I wish i was in the wii world.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
