Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
