I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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