My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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