Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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