TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Your penis caused this!
Randomize
