you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Floor bacon is actually really good
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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