my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
