Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
