it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Randomize
