I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
