Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
