Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize