You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
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