Small penises have feelings too.
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
