i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
