you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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