yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Randomize
