well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I'm too high and old for this...
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
