Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Randomize
