some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
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