is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Randomize
