For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize
