Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
