just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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