he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
