watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
