physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Randomize