Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
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