I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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