Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
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