that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
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