Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
Randomize
