Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
