haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize
