You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
