you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
