New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
wow bdsm is so cute
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
