He is such a slut. More and more my type.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize
