umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
