he thought i was a dude.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
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