Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
