And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Randomize