I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
