is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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